Text 3 There are at least two causes of anxiety: conflict and stress. As an example of the former, we can rarely predict the precise consequences of what we do, but we are awarded (oz cursed) with the intellectual capacity to anticipate the advantages and disadvantages which may arise for any action we may be contemplating. Very commonly we axe faced with a choice between several courses of action, all of which we have reasons for or against. This state of affairs -- in psychological jargon, multiple approach-avoidance conflict -- accounts for a great deal of our worrying: worrying, that is, about what to do. The other major source of worry is the dreadful things which may happen or have happened to us or to those we care for. Among the most stressful of these are death, illness, loss of work, money problems, marital problems and retirement. Such worries have a rational basis, but we are curiously irrational in the way we pursue them. For example, fear of death is as strong among young adults as among the elderly and it does not seem to be reduced by any sort of religious faith, including the belief that there is life after death. It is equally surprising that objective measures of anxiety suggest that we are as worried the hour before having a tooth filled as when we face a major medical operation. How do we deal with worries Psychiatrists point to a number of defensive devices we can use to turn them aside. We can avoid the situations which induce them, one of the example being that some people refuse to fly in airplanes. We can deny that we have the worry at all, which may be risky if the worry is well-founded. Alternatively, we may repress it. These are hazardous; the former may lead to free-floating, clinical anxiety, while the latter is a way of saying that many physical troubles seem to be primarily emotional in origin. Temporary relief from anxiety can be obtained through engaging in a variety of coping behaviors. These include many of the commonest items of our behavioral repertoire. Smoking, drinking, sleeping, eating, taking physical exercise, daydreaming: all can be used to reduce anxiety when the occasion demands it. It is when they fail that worrying or anxiety threatens to become a clinical problem. Of course, some people worry more than others, whatever the circumstances. So far I have been discus- sing the state of anxiety, which is largely the product of the amount of stress an individual experiences. But anxiety is also a personality trait, closely related to Eysenck’s neuroticism dimension, and the genes we inherit may make us likely become worriers. The importance of constitutional factors is underlined by the fact that people rarely have breakdowns for the first time later in life, despite the fact that stress-inducing events become more frequent as we get older. Solutions to worrying such as smoking, drinking and physical exercise ______.
A. make things worse if we are worried
B. do nothing to overcome anxiety
C. are often satisfactory for a short time
D. merely produce physical strain to cover up mental stress
Love means growth for both myself and the person I love. If I love you, 1 am growing as a result of my love. You are a stimulant for me to become more fully what i’ might become, and my loving enhances your being as well. We each grow as a result of caring and being cared for; we each share in an enriching experience that doesn’t detract from our being. Love means making a commitment to the person I love. This com mitment doesn’t entail surrendering our total selves to each other; nor does it imply that the relationship is necessarily permanent. It does entail a willingness to stay with each other in times of pain, uncertainty, strug gle, and despair, as well as in times of calm and enjoyment, love means trusting the person ! love. If I love you, I trust that you will accept my caring and my love and that you won’t deliberately hurt me. I trust that you will find me lovable and that you won’t abandon me; I trust the reciprocal nature of our love. If we trust each other, we are willing to be open to each other and can shed masks and pretenses and reveal our true selves.