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Social customs and ways of behaving change. Things which were considered impolite many years ago are now acceptable. Just a few years ago, it was considered impolite behavior for a man to smoke on the street. No man who thought of himself as being a gentleman would make a fool of himself by smoking when a lady was in a room.Customs also differ from country to country. Does a man walk on the left or the right of a woman in your country Or doesn"t it matter Should you use both hands when you are eating Should leave one in your lap or on the tableThe Americans and the British not only speak the same language but also share a large number of social customs. For example, in both America and England people shake hands when they meet each other for the first time. Also, most Englishman will open a door for a woman or offer their seat to a woman, and so will most Americans. Promptness (准时) is important both in England and in America. That is, if a dinner invitation is for 7 o"clock, the dinner guest either arrives close to that time or calls up to explain his delay.The important thing to remember about social customs is not to do anything that might make other people feel uncomfortable—especially if they are your guests. When the food was served, one of the guests started to eat his peas with a knife. The other guests were amused or shocked, but the host calmly picked up his knife and began eating in the same way. It would have been bad manners to make his guest feel foolish or uncomfortable. "It would have been bad manners to make his guests feel foolish or uncomfortable." "Bad manners" means （）
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When I begin planning to move to Auckland to study, my mother was worried about a lack of jobs and cultural differences. Ignoring these 1 , I got there in July 2010. 2 I arrived, I realized the importance of getting a job 3 my living experience. Determined to do this 4 , I spent several weeks going door-to-door for a job, but found 5 response (回应).One afternoon, I walked into a building to ask 6 there were any job opportunities. The people there advised me not to continue my job search in that 7 . As I was about to 8 , a man who had been listening approached me and asked me to wait outside 9 . Nearly ten minutes later, he 10 . He asked me about my plans and encouraged me to stay 11 . Then he offered to take me to Royal Oak to 12 a job.I was a little surprised, but had a 13 feeling about him. Along the way, I realized that I had 14 resumes. Seeing this, the man 15 at his business partner"s office to make me fifteen 16 copies. He also gave me some 17 on dressing and speaking. I handed out my resumes and went home feeling very 18 . The following day, I received a 19 from a store in Royal Oak offering me a job.It seems that the world always 20 to you when you need it. And this time, it was a complete stranger who turned out to be a real blessing. 18（）
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I suppose that the most basic and powerful way to connect to another person is to listen. Just listen. Perhaps the most important thing we ever give each other is our attention, and especially if it"s given from the heart. When people are talking, there"s no need to do anything but receive them. Listen to what they"re saying. Care about it. Most times caring about it is even more important than understanding it. Most of us don"t value ourselves or our love enough to know this. It has taken me a long time to believe in the power of simple saying "I"m so sorry." when someone is in pain.One of my patients told me that when she tried to tell her story, people often interrupted to tell her that they once had something just like that happening to her. Subtly, her pain became a story about them. Eventually she stopped talking to most people. We connect through listening. When we interrupt what someone is saying to let them know that we understand, we move the focus of attention to ourselves. When we listen, they know we care.I have ever learned to respond to someone crying by just listening. In the old clays I used to reach for the handkerchiefs, until I realized that passing a person a handkerchief may be just another way to shut him down, to take them out of their experience of sadness. Now I just listen. When they have cried all they need to cry, they find me there with them.This simple thing has not been that easy to learn. It certainly went against everything I had been taught since I was very young. I thought people listened only because they were too shy to speak or did not know the answer. But now I know that a loving silence often has far more power to heal than the kindest words. What does the author value most in the communication with each other
When I begin planning to move to Auckland to study, my mother was worried about a lack of jobs and cultural differences. Ignoring these 1 , I got there in July 2010. 2 I arrived, I realized the importance of getting a job 3 my living experience. Determined to do this 4 , I spent several weeks going door-to-door for a job, but found 5 response (回应).One afternoon, I walked into a building to ask 6 there were any job opportunities. The people there advised me not to continue my job search in that 7 . As I was about to 8 , a man who had been listening approached me and asked me to wait outside 9 . Nearly ten minutes later, he 10 . He asked me about my plans and encouraged me to stay 11 . Then he offered to take me to Royal Oak to 12 a job.I was a little surprised, but had a 13 feeling about him. Along the way, I realized that I had 14 resumes. Seeing this, the man 15 at his business partner"s office to make me fifteen 16 copies. He also gave me some 17 on dressing and speaking. I handed out my resumes and went home feeling very 18 . The following day, I received a 19 from a store in Royal Oak offering me a job.It seems that the world always 20 to you when you need it. And this time, it was a complete stranger who turned out to be a real blessing. 2（）
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