You know you’re an extreme parent if. "... your child, who does not have a documented learning disability, has more than three tutors." "... you imagine that your child is going to play professional sports even though no coach has predicted this outcome" "... you have your child take 30 practice SAT exams before the actual test." These real-life examples come from Michael Thompson, a psychologist who has seen extreme parenting on the front lines for many years, and who has been called in by schools across the U. S. to guide parents on how to tone it down. Thompson acknowledges that parents want the best for their children. But he warns parents against overestimating their roles in a child’s development, which can lead to extreme behavior and a crooked sense of how the kids are doing. He recalls a mother who challenged her son’s high school guidance counselor after he suggested several colleges based on the student’s academics. When she expressed her disappointment, the guidance counselor explained:"Your son is not in the top half of the class." The mother’s response: "Yes, but nobody told me he was in the bottom half." Extreme parenting is driven by the parent who believes "they are the engine of how their children will turn out," Thompson says. The trouble comes when parents cross the line from healthy involvement to trying to pave a straight line to success. And it’s not always a bright line. About 10 years ago, Psychology Today columnist Hara Estroff Marano began investigating a dramatic rise in depression on college campuses. She spoke to about 400 college counselors. In almost every case she says she heard the same thing: "These kids have no coping skills. They’d been overprotected by parents who were pushing them to achieve-who were shielding them from bumps to have a straight shot at success." This informs Marano’s view of extreme parenting, which involves parents who don’t give their children enough latitude to experience failure. "You know you’re an extreme parent when you take over tasks for your kids," Marano says, "Or you solve their math problems for them. Or you ask them to do something, like tie their shoes, and get impatient, so you end up tying them." From the study of Hara Estroff Marano, nearly all college counselors agreed that kids are lacking in______.